Saturday, May 16, 2009

Leaky Eyes and Lumpy Throat Syndrome

The oddest thing came over me on Saturday afternoon. I sat with several other hundred individuals to witness the graduation ceremony of 2009's graduating students from the West Michigan Homeschool Fine Arts Association.

This year there were no children of mine graduating, no students that I am even terribly close to, yet, I sat there most of the time with leaky eyes and a lumpy throat. Sometimes it was almost uncontrollable. I listened to students give wonderful speeches and saw parents give their children diplomas and hugs and receive roses and smiles. Tyler sat beside me and I am sure wondered at times if I was going to be alright. I sort of wondered the same thing...

Then it occurred to me that this happens often at this time of year. It's not a spring allergy, but it's just as predictable. It's the time of year that causes me to reflect on this bittersweet role we have, as moms.

We raise them to let them go. This is our role, and if we've done it well, they will fly! That is our hope, our prayer and our desire. But when they fly they are flying away... And things will never be quite the same. Agh...these are the thoughts that always float around in my mind and in my heart at this time of year.

And this year, the effects of these thoughts came closer to home than ever, because next spring, Tyler will be among this group of students graduating from High School, walking down that aisle, receiving the diploma, switching the tassel to the other side, then throwing his cap in the air. What happens then? Truly, only God really knows.

But that is also what makes it not only bitter, but sweet. What a great adventure this thing called 'life' is. God knows the plans he has for us, plans to bless us, not to harm us, plans to give us a future and a hope....Jeremiah 29:11....and this is true for each and every one of us...for Tyler, for me, for Tim, for Emily, and for you and yours as well.

So what I am resolved to do is to savor, to the best of my ability, each and every moment of this upcoming year, as I have attempted to cherish each moment of the past seventeen and a half years of being a mom...and know that the days ahead will bring much JOY! many reasons to CELEBRATE...despite, or perhaps due to the occasional leaky eyes and lumpy throat.

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